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n/a, Male
Ned's Declassified Pun
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Eventually I will whore myself out to those who need voice actors, but first I need equipment. Occasionally I'll post a generally shitty review on games in hopes of someone recognizing my nonexistent genius.

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Community Stats
Level 1 Voice Actor
Normal Whistle
Ranked as Civilian

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Latest News

Come at me bros! (Resume?)

2013-03-29 03:40:53 by Sarnac

Name: Christian Brian Hirtzel
Sex: Male
Age: 18
Vocal Range: Low alto-mid bass

Well my friends, you have a new voice actor among you! Now that I've spend a ludicrously small amount of money on entirely mediocre equipment, I want to get my voice out there! I now own a Hisonic HM-800 dynamic microphone and a desktop stand and both Goldwave AND Audacity. Now that I am over 18, I am also allowed to surf this great big interweb without having to file the three-page request forms in triplicate to get my parents' permission.
For this reason I would like to give my lack of talents to all of you! For everyone out in the world of http://www.NewGrounds(dot) in need of a voice actor for any reason whatsoever, I am here for you! Whether you desire an extra voice in the background, an extra voice in the FOREground, or... whatever else actors might do...
But I know exactly what you're thinking:
"I don't give a shit about you."
I understand. But here's what I WANT you to think!
"If your mic is so regular, what am I supposed to expect from you?"
Well here are what you might call my 'credentials.'
Four years in high school radio. A radio station called KYDS 91.5 FM Sacramento where I actually spoke on the air. That's four whole years of real practice. Practice in both writing scripts and creating clever promos and public service announcements, and also in improvising on the air with witty banter and interesting topics. I did well enough to be promoted to manager of the public service announcements, charged with both TEACHING young fools about creating clever scripts and dealing with the shit from the college radio station that rebroadcasted on our station thus wasting our fucking air time with their lackluster and often entirely inappropriate shit.
Collectively, almost two years of improvisational practice and training. I took one year of beginning improvisation classes at a local comedy club. After that long planetary cycle I decided I learned more than I could probably comprehend or apply and took six long weeks of advanced classes where I learned I WAS able to comprehend what I was talk, however I could not apply any of it. Two years later, I joined an improvisation group and stayed for half a year. Throughout those six months I had the grandest of times because I was in an atmosphere where I could actually be funny, and I feel I was.
Some acting shit. In my last two years of high school I joined the drama class in order to audition to plays. There are two plays per year, a fall drama and a spring musical. I got parts in all four, and my last two parts were actually of relative importance. I was a support the first two times and a LEAD the last two times. I feel this qualifies me for...

In Conclusion! If anyone is interested in hearing some vocal samples I am more than happy to find myself a script to create a sample just for you. I charge nothing for everything, I'm simply attempting to get my voice out into the world and also I really have nothing else to do with my life I'm so sad and lonely guys please help me.
You may contact me at and I will ask for legal representation in my reply.
In all seriousness, thank you for considering me, my friends.

Recent Game Medals

Ending #4 10 Points You completed to ending 4. Medal Stats.
Ending #2 10 Points You completed to ending 2. Medal Stats.
Ending #1 10 Points You completed to ending 1. Medal Stats.
10. Talkative 5 Points Talk to your first NPC. Medal Stats.
01. Uprising 5 Points Start a new game for the first time. Medal Stats.
The Lich Is My Bitch 100 Points Reveal the Lich with your clever, abstract thinking Medal Stats.
We Died for a Chalice 10 Points Get everyone killed simultaneously... Medal Stats.
Don't give up, chuck 5 Points Get Slayn killed... Medal Stats.
Live free or tie hard 5 Points Get Etoh killed... Medal Stats.
You must be stoned 5 Points Get Deedlit killed... Medal Stats.

Total Medals Earned: 647 (From 84 different games.)

Latest Shared Creations

UNFINISHED :D Added to syncdata for Lip Syncinator Oct 6, 2012. Load Level